Introduction

I am an unapologetic dilettante.  I dabble in various interests for various amounts of time, without becoming an expert on anything. One day I’m interested in the English Civil War and the next day, I’m into String Theory.  The day after that, it might be ecclesiastical architecture or Gnosticism. My mind bounces around like a ball in a pinball machine, and while that kind of intellectual turmoil has molded me into being very shallow, it also keeps me constantly entertained and engaged.  

Although I have many interests, I have few talents. Well, just one talent, really. I am a fairly competent writer but I lack discipline and practice, because I am the definition of the word “slacker”. I’ve turned goofing off into a life philosophy and the meaning of my existence. It’s amusing, but it also seems like a slight waste of time as well.  This is why I’ve resolved (yet again) to blog. An athlete keeps their gym bag in their car; an artist carries around a sketchbook.  If I have a repository for writing, I may actually do it more often and keep the one talent I have from drying up and dying.

Topics will range, as the cliché goes, from the ridiculous (I wish fanny packs weren’t so lame because they really are incredibly convenient) to the sublime (why does Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” move me to tears?)  Of course, the running theme throughout all my blog entries will be me, because I’m also immensely self-centered.  I don’t mean arrogant. I mean I’m narcissistic in its literal sense: I’m fascinated by myself. I think all writers are egocentric to some degree. Why else would we assume other people want to read what we write?

YOU are reading this, so my evil plan has worked.  Please feel free to stop back occasionally. I can promise neither quality nor quantity, but I will occasionally post a photograph that might be nice to look at. Or a manifesto. The sky’s the limit when a slacker is in charge.

By the way, my blog’s name derives from one of my favorite Monty Python sketches, wherein Mr. Milton, the sole proprietor of the Whizzo Chocolate Company, must defend his revolting assortment of candy flavors to the Hygiene Squad, including the Crunchy Frog: "We use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest-quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope and lovingly frosted with glucose."  Much, MUCH more on Monty Python in later entries.  I promise.